3 Mistakes and Solutions of Victims of Infidelity

 3 Mistakes and Solutions of Victims of Infidelity    So you think God isn’t being fair? Your spouse cheated, lied upon confrontation, then God allows him a promotion and a raise and you ask: Isn’t God watching? That, my friends, is the first mistake in our series which we’ll cover in the next three blog posts.

Mistake #1  Thinking God Isn’t Watching

Mistake #2  Believing God Wants to Zap You

Mistake #3  Believing Your Happiness Is God’s Top Priority

Today: Mistake # 1 Thinking God Isn’t Watching

God cares about his children and you can be sure He is watching. He also is very angry with the offenders who spurn His laws.

  

image thanks to  Amazon.com

image thanks to
Amazon.com

    God is touched with the feelings of your infirmities. God is also observing those who think their infidelity is hidden. One Israeli soldier may have thought that in the battle of Ai. He took articles of the spoils of war which by covenant had been devoted for destruction. He secretly buried them in his tent. (Like there are any secrets kept from God, right?)   

Listen in:       Johua is calling every tribe, every family down to the very man to line up. Searching for the culprit, the lot falls on Achan. Busted!

God is bringing judgment as the tribes stand in awe. Severe punishment is pronounced. God had shown them in the next battle that they could not stand against their enemies without God on their side. Someone had stolen the accursed things and put them among their own stuff. God’s anger burned and fire was the consequences for the stolen items, Achan and his sons and daughters, donkeys, sheep and cattle were put to death. The stolen items and all Achan owned were burned.

God is Watching You 

Solution to Mistake #1 Change Your Thinking and Understand God’s Anger and Judgment

Psalm 30:5 “For his anger lasts but a moment; but his favor lasts a lifetime.” God is surely watching, He sees inside every tent and even underground. Sin arouses His anger. “Do not take advantage of the widow or the fatherless. If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry. My anger will be aroused” (Exodus 22:22-24). There are over a hundred verses in the Old Testament alone regarding God’s care for the needy, the helpless, the poor. He hates injustice. This passage goes on to say that those who afflict the widows will be taken with the sword and their wives will be widows and their children orphans.

Review: God sees every dark corner, every tent and underground, Sin arouses His anger.

Solution: 1. Change your thinking by getting to know God and His characteristics. Do a search of God’s judgments on sin.*(or see below)

2. Be aware of His watchful eye, His loving care for the afflicted. You and your children in this case.

3. Know that He is watching and He wants to hear from you. Make your request known to Him

Look for God’s blessings even in the worse situations. He is a good God but sometimes we don’t recognize His goodness. You may feel God is blessing your mate for wrong doing by giving him a promotion but could God be working to your advantage by giving him that raise? Will this in any way benefit you and your children?

*If you are so overwhelmed that doing a search for verses is beyond you, Kay Arthur has done the work for you. Check out her helpful devotional.

link for lord heal my hurts

Lord Heal My Hurts

Lord Heal My Hurts

Amazon Review:

No Matter How Deep the Wounds, God Can Heal Your Hurts.

Everyone hurts. The pain runs deep, the scars never seem to fade, the memories torment us. As a result, our growth is stunted, our walk crippled, our relationships infected. Will relief never come?

Yes — when you put yourself in the hands of Jehovah-rapha, the God who heals! No matter what you’ve done or what’s been done to you, He wants to be your refuge.

 

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer:

Marlene Hibbard is not a professional counselor and recommends the above Christ-followers for counseling services. This site offers resources and advice from Hibbard’s personal experience and experience in counseling as a Pastor’s wife for twenty-plus years. This site is not intended to be a substitute for getting professional help but encourages readers to get professional help.

Relationships Involve Suffering

Responding With Humility to Trials

Quick Tip of the Day

What’s the most difficult part of struggling in a relationship or breaking up? For most it would have to be responding with humility. In the banner on the top of this page we see where our supernatural help comes from. No, I’m not referring to my picture. In the middle of the banner you’ll find the word Bible. That’s what this blog is about.

Image thanks to CEF Press, Warrenton, MO

Image thanks to CEF Press, Warrenton, MO

To get a good perspective on suffering, there is a man in the Old Testament who can teach us a few things.   As C.J. Mahaney states it in Humility True Greatness: “I want to take you…into the presence of someone for whom life did not make sense, someone whose horizon foretold appalling and dreadful suffering for himself and God’s people, and yet who learned a divine perspective on suffering and trials– a perspective that altogether transformed him from a complainer and a questioner into a faith-filled worshiper of God” C. J. Mahaney, Humility True Greatness (Colorado Springs, CO: Multnomah, 2005), 137.

Read about Habakkuk in the book named for him in your Holy Bible. Then come back for a discussion and state your opinions in the comments area by clicking the top right icon on this page.

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Marlene Hibbard is not a professional counselor and recommends the above Christ-followers for counseling services. This site offers resources and advice from Hibbard’s personal experience and experience in counseling as a Pastor’s wife for twenty-plus years. This site is not intended to be a substitute for getting professional help but encourages readers to get professional help.

 

 

Blessings on Resurrection Sunday

Easter is New Beginnings

Blessings on Resurrection Sunday

Eggs—the symbol of new life beginning.eggs colored

Christ died in order that we could have new life. Everlasting life. But He rose again to newness of life. The apostle Paul tells us to be made new in Ephesians. I printed the following up for myself to memorize. You and I can start over today! I’m posting Ephesians 4:21-32 in the Amplified Version as it’s a real attention catcher starting out

NEW BEGINNINGS 

 

Quick Tip of the Day

Quick Tip on Quick Answers to Prayer

George Mueller Faith Cox Bailey                                          http://tinyurl.com/lwkug7u 

“Why, Beta? Why was he kneeling?” George Mueller asked his friend after the first time George saw a man kneel to pray.

“It’s always done. At least here. That’s why.”

Finding Beta’s answer insufficient, George answered his own question.

“I know why. He had to kneel because he wanted to tell God that he was humble and human and that God was almighty and all-wise. He was showing his awe, his fear, his adoration, Beta!”

From my own experience I believe it makes a difference when we humble ourselves and stop what we are doing to talk to God. Take it to the Lord on your knees.

Give your opinion by clicking on the cloud icon at the top left of this post. We want to hear from you. 

 

Take Time to Pray for Your Marriage

Take It to the Lord in Prayer

“Pray without ceasing” just as Paul admonishes us in

II Thessalonians 5:17.

HAVE YOU DONE THAT YET?

While “pray without ceasing” indicates an attitude of continual
prayer, there’s something powerful about getting right down on your
knees and spending time talking with God about your decisions, your
problems and praising Him that you can do so. In my experience there
have been many divine revelations while I was on my knees or shortly
thereafter. Maybe that’s because God says, “be still and know that I
am God”. Even if it’s a matter of trying to find something I’ve lost,
I find that if I take the time to kneel down and pray for God’s help,
I find it faster. Before you knock it, try it.

What’s the number one reason we don’t pray as we ought to? Does your answer have anything to do with time? How would it work for you if you could increase your efficiency in prayer time?

It Does Take Time To Pray
Try this quick tip. Do you plan to pray? You plan other activities,
right? In Chapter 10 of Time Management From the Inside Out, by Julie
Morgenstern, you’ll learn how to schedule. Put prayer time in that
schedule.
When you use scripture to pray, it can help you to stay focused.
Therefore, it encourages you to pray more. You need not wonder what to say and that saves time. It’ helps you stay focused as well. You can use Colossians 1:9-12 to pray for yourself. If your mate is a Christ-
follower you can pray the same verses for them. It’s the prayer Paul
prayed for the Colossian believers and many other.

Sample prayer from Colossians:

Chapter 1:9-12 Lord, fill ___________ (me or my mate) with the
knowledge of Your will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding.
I pray this so that we will live lives worthy of You, Lord, that we
may please you in every way, bearing fruit in every good work, growing
in the knowledge of Yourself and your Word. Please strengthen us (or
me) with all power according to your glorious might so that I may have
great endurance and patience, and joyfully give thanks to You…etc.

There are many other patterns for prayer in the letters Paul wrote.

Godly Sorrow Works Repentence

The more you use these scriptural patterns to fulfill your responsibility of praying for your marital problems, the more you will see God work and the more encouraged you will be to pray. Make it your top priority. It’s life-changing. Leave a comment (above right cloud icon) or send a private email to let us know how God is working. Email address: marlenexls@gmail.com

Disclaimer: Marlene Hibbard is not a professional counselor and
recommends the Christ-followers for counseling services found by
clicking on Resources under the above banner. This site offers support
only and does not constitute professional advise. Marlene Hibbard
takes no responsibility for any actions taken on the basis of the
information provided here nor is said information intended to be a
substitute for professional help.

Don’t Sweat the Infidel

Don’t Sweat the Infidel
By Marlene A Hibbard
(To leave a comment, click on the icon at top right of this post.)

love triangle t_01-23-31_2010-07-05_08-04-52
“Do not fret because of evildoers. Be not envious toward wrongdoers. For they will wither quickly like the grass and fade like the green herb” (Psalm 37:1,2).
Sometimes it’s a very long wait and those offenders have not begun to “wither”. You see no fulfillment of this verse. But you don’t know what’s happening inside them? Maybe you’ll never know about it but sin’s cancer is eating away inside them or some sexually transmitted disease is causing blood in his urine. Not that vindication is our goal but you may be facing temptation and asking yourself, “Why should I practice restraint and resist temptation while he’s out philandering and seemingly getting away with it.”
What to do while we’re waiting.
“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord” (Psalm 37:3).
Do not worry about or focus on that cheater at all. Focus on God and his promises.
Consider Pharaoh and how impatient the Israelites must have been waiting for their freedom while Moses was paying his visits to the King and God kept hardening Pharaoh’s wicked heart. He even claims to be confessing his sin to Jehovah in Exodus 10:16. He asks for forgiveness. He begs Moses to plead with God to forgive him and take away this deadly plague. “I solemnly promise that I will let you go as soon as the locusts are gone” (Exodus 10:17)
You may have had a mate who keeps on cheating, then comes back and asks forgiveness and makes promises that sound sincere. Even your church officials have encouraged you to take him back and forgive seventy times seven. Don’t let your heart be troubled. You’ve been told that once he repents you are obligated to be reconciled. What a dilemma. How does anyone know that heart of another person? Is his repentance sincere or not? Take another look at Pharaoh. If you didn’t know the story would you believe he was truly sorry for his rebellion or just wanting the plagues to stop? There’s no way you can know. Also, if he is truly repentant, does God command forgiveness or reconciliation? Learn to take action by reading: The Emotionally Destructive Marriage by Leslie Vernick

Leave a comment and we will discuss this further.

By the way, sometimes your pastor or church leaders can be wrong. It’s happened.

Disclaimer:

Marlene Hibbard is not a professional counselor and recommends the above Christ-followers for counseling services (see Resources under banner). This site offers support only and does not constitute professional advise. Marlene Hibbard takes no responsibility for any actions taken on the basis of the information provided here nor is said information intended to be a substitute for professional help.

Verse for the Day II Corinthians 4: 16,17

 

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“That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our inner

image courtesy of www.dailymail.co.uk

image courtesy of www.dailymail.co.uk

in the Lord is growing every day. These troubles and sufferings of ours are, after all, quite small and won’t last very long. Yet this short time of distress will result in God’s richest blessing upon us forever and ever!” (II Corinthians 4:16, 17;The Living Bible Version of the Life Application Bible).

Relationship Secrets Revealed

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This is the final part of this series and just in time for Valentine’s Day
The final secret you didn’t hear about in your premarital counseling is:
Woman’s # One Need is Attention and Devotion

image courtesy of bestvalentines2014.com

image courtesy of bestvalentines2014.com

What an opportunity to advise you guys out there who are in the midst of marital problems. You can swallow your pride, get out there and use your imagination and spoil her even if you don’t feel like it. Even if you don’t have the feelings in your heart right now. Do you know that love is not a feeling. No, it’s an action. Maybe it’s your wife who was the unfaithful partner in this marriage. You feel like really messing her up but instead you go out and buy her flowers, (it doesn’t have to be Valentine’s Day). She may or may not appreciate your attention at this moment but keep it up and see if it makes a difference. Women need attention. Each partner must take a percentage of the blame when things go wrong in a marriage.
If you are only learning for the first time that women need attention and devotion then at least you did read it here today. Do something with the information. Take action. They don’t even have to be expensive gifts. In fact, if she’s used to you giving expensive gifts it may not be the thing at all. Learn what her love language is.

image courtesy of Amazon.com

image courtesy of Amazon.com

Meet a need and even if you get an adverse response from her, you did the right thing before God. Is she deserving, maybe not, but then it means all the more. What do we deserve? Do we deserve the payment Christ made on the cross for our sins? No. That was grace on his part to come and die. Can you express grace?

Gary Chapman’s book offers great insight into how to adapt to your mate by understanding what language they speak and listen to in the love department. If you want help click here 

Disclaimer:

Marlene Hibbard is not a professional counselor and recommends the above Christ-followers for counseling services (see Resources under banner). This site offers support only and does not constitute professional advise. Marlene Hibbard takes no responsibility for any actions taken on the basis of the information provided here nor is said information intended to be a substitute for professional help.